Cut in line today

(AA Lace tee and interlock mini-skirt, YSL Tribute sandals, H&M elephant necklace)

A little sneak-a-peek to your bustier always guarantees a cut in line BUT that's not how I play the game. See, I always avoid the elderly cos they have high moral standards (and a weapon aka a cane) to rebuke a young hooligan like me in public should I shove grandma to the ground. Avoid the middle of the line cos people there are often freakin' out whether or not they'd make the cut-off guestlist for free-entry anywhere. Jumpin' in front of tourists is the best cos they don't know how we do it, they often don't speak Engrish and they aren't gonna put up a fight against 6ft tall women. The best however, has got to be the FRONT of the line. Whether I call on my VIP host or just saunter in where peeps are gasping at how outrageous I can be, I always cheekily tell them to relax since they're gettin' in after me anyway. Teehee.

You don't need 24/7 updates!

(Se Hotel, TKent's Colin)

When life gives you lemons, squeeze them into your caipirinha and get crunk! Ignoring round-the-clock news (especially when it leaves me in a permanent state of suspense and anxiety with a remote connection to countries I can't pronounce) I turned off my crackberry. You heard me. I-did-it! I spent a powder-free day at Se Hotel's deck in H&M bikini separates then Steve Lawler: Intervention at the Hard Rock. Note to gringos, gwai-los and phirangs: If you want to have an Asian themed hotel with an Asian name - "Se," which means the number "four" coincidentally rhyming with the word DEATH in Chinese is NOT the way to go. Shame on you. Lolz with my peeps. Peace!

Expand your life span

(Syrah, 5th avenue)

I've decided that an asian girl's shelf-life is til she's 40. We people just don't age. Ever. I swear the karate masters in movies just never die - it's the same whisker-beard guy in every movie teaching new kids how to catch flies with his chopsticks.  But if rats live 33% longer on a very low calorie diet, doesn't that apply to humans? The less free radical damage to my cellular hoo-hah I have, the better. So we stuck to a glass of red wine at Syrah to boost our heart and laughter, then a fondue dinner at the Melting Pot upstairs with a dash of melted chocolate goodness. Did I mention that this wine bar is "Alice in Wonderland" themed? Yall gotta tumble down the rabbit hole into the right door to get in here? No one knows how this free-radical mechanism works anyhow so I'm ploughing cautiously but forward nonetheless.

We be steady mobbin'

(YSL gold Tribute sandals)

I'm a terrible photographer, I know. I'll just stick to my strengths in selling 4 pairs of shoes to pay for these babies that just went on sale in Neimans. Who's a boss now?

Order an impossible pizza

(Emporio Armani watch)

Stripped bare of fluffy/wuffy decor, the old warehouse transformed into a bar serving thin crust pizza makes living right across from Basic REEEEEAL dangerous. But ordering garlic white pizza with baby clams, mushrooms, mash-taters, ricotta reeeeeal easy. Would like some cheerios on that to make'm crunchy with the gooey texture of the clam. Either way, this place is poppin' come 11pm and I'm heading there after work - in my England gear. Sweet Charriooott....

Improve your signature today.

(LF woven top, Millau. Jeffrey Campbell, Zebra Ticks. Purse, MNG. Skirt, Forever21 dress cut-up. Turquoise bracelet, Vintage.)

Mixing prints. Hard to do when you're over 100lbs but I'm tryin' to improve my signature today. In an increasingly digitized society when you're defined by your social security number (that I don't have) and bank account numbers, your signature is the very last crumb of your individuality. I'm letting other great historical signatures inspire mine, but I'ma refine is constantly, and above all, take pride in mis-matching my style. Touche away!

Mi Casa es su casa!

(Metrome, East Village)

Hectic week moving 8 boxes into this loft, then house-broke it with some peri-peri chicken and naan bread. Trying to relax by doing everything backwards today - started the day off with some cheese+crackers, a siesta, then handing in some forms at 11am and letting the office-people know it's "Good night" then whizzing off to start my internship at 3pm. Wonderful topsy-turvy fall down the rabbit hole.